so let's talk penis.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
