I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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