Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
