I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
