I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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