There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Sponge bath it is.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize