grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
