Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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