Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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