So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I wish you could order shots online.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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