you mean i was at the winter classic?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
