i think my tv is drunk
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
