Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I have aggressive nipples.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize