i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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