he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
