i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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