I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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