i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
