I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
