i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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