just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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