Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
this will be a night to untag.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize