Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
