porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
She said her name was "party"
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Randomize
