you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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