You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
