Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
