Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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