I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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