U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
