1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
