Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
