I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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