is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize