I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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