i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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