I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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