nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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