Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
