im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Im part way to drunk.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize
