Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize