there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
