We're like a lot better than the average bears
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
