I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
