Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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