There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
