My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
