i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm really busy with my period
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