Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
