i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
