I just threw up on my dentist
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
