i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
