I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
